Bad boy? Bad girl? Are you sure?

Also watch Scolding your child? Make it effective

Adults dealing with children often use the labels “Bad boy” or “Bad girl” with remarkable ease. Do you?

Are you sure your child is a “bad boy” or a bad girl”? If not – should you really label them?

The labels Good boy / bad boy and good girl/ bad girl are used by adults dealing with children with remarkable ease.

We don’t think twice before using these labels casually and nonchalantly with our children – but it is worth it to stop and think of how the labelled child may feel about the label we affix with such ease

When your child does something that you don’t like – you feel bad.

But does that make your child bad?

The answer of course is no.  Then isn’t it wrong to call your child a bad boy or bad girl

When we discipline our children we must remember that children are always good. It is their behaviour that is sometimes bad

And the purpose of discipline is to point out what your child has done wrong and correct it. Not to attach a label that makes him think of himself as a bad person

So if Aryan paints all over your newly painted wall – of course you don’t like it. Of course you don’t want him to do it again. Of course you want him to understand that this is not acceptable behaviour. But does it help to call him bad

Even I you don’t like what your child does – it doesn’t make him bad – and so you should not call him bad

It is unfair to label him.

Your child is always good. But he can behave badly sometimes.

Remind yourself of this when you discipline your child.

Praise or correct the “behavior” don’t bring in the intrinsic character of the child
Keep the child’s behavior separate from him.
Tell your child “You are good and wonderful. But your behavior today was not so good. This is what it would be nice to do next time.”

The purpose of discipline is – to change your child’s behaviour and make it better. Not to dent his self-esteem and damage him for life

Read the article 5 ways to Communicate for Effective Loving Discipline

Show Comments

No Responses Yet

Leave a Reply